Shame Free Living



by Mikki Lawrence, LPC

God Created Us Shame-free
Genesis 2:25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
The Results of Sin
Genesis 3:7 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings. And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden.9 Then the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, “Where are you?”10 So he said, “I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself.” 11 And He said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you that you should not eat?”12 Then the man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.”13 And the Lord God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?” The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”

Is it Guilt or is it Shame?
– Guilt says, “I’ve done something bad.”
– Shame says, “I am bad.”
– Guilt focuses on what you’ve done.
– Shame focuses on who you are.
– Guilt can lead to spiritual growth.
– Shame keeps us stuck.

The Hiding Game
-Notice Adam and Eve hid themselves. Sin and shame cause us to hide from our reality. The enemy uses this to cause us to bury, neglect, and ignore the truth we need to face to become free.
– Shame also causes us to believe that God has abandoned us and that we are worthless and irredeemable.
-Many people live their lives hiding from the God who always sees them thinking thoughts about Him that are not true. God is love and comes after the sinner. The enemy wants to think we have to earn our way into God’s presence which we can never do.

The Blame Game
-Notice how Adam blamed Eve and Eve blamed the serpent. There is something about sin and shame that causes us to not want to take responsibility for our actions. Yet, repentance means we do own it and want God’s help to change.

The Shameful Mind
In a word, it is the mind that views oneself as worthless or too far gone into the badland to ever recover. Let’s see this operating in the mind of the prodigal son.

Luke 15:20 “And he arose and came to his father. But when he was still a great way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him. 21 And the son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight, and am no longer worthy to be called your son.’
22 “But the father said to his servants, ‘Bring out the best robe and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand and sandals on his feet. 23 And bring the fatted calf here and kill it, and let us eat and be merry; 24 for this my son was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ And they began to be merry.

-He felt unworthy.
-He aspired to being “just” a slave.

– Notice Father calls him son.
– Father puts the BEST robe on him.
– Father throws a party.
– Father rejoices
-The religious elder brother sulks.

So What Do We Do About Guilt and Shame?
– When we are truly guilty, we repent, take responsibility; we make it right to whatever degree we are able.
– When we feel shame, we must move our thoughts to the cross and value the finished work of Jesus. Shame came because of the curse, but Jesus became a curse for us!
-Think through the truth of Grace when you look at your life. Abandon the law mentality and see yourself through God’s loving gift of grace in Christ.
– Remember it’s about who He is and who you are in Him! That’s your true identity!

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